It surprises people, but, in fact, the best cure for sadness is happiness. Anything that diminishes your ability to build your own happiness must be avoided or eliminated. For example, don’t hitch your happiness to external rewards or postpone being happy until sometime in the future. Don’t expect someone else to make you happy. Don’t allow your emotions to become habitual and stuck or close yourself off from new experiences. Don’t ignore the signals of inner tension and conflict, dwell on the past or live in fear of the future. Most of all: don’t equate happiness with momentary pleasure.
In a consumer-driven society, it’s all too easy to fall into all the don’ts on this list, because they share the same element: linking happiness with temporary pleasure and external rewards. Of course, we all live for the pleasure that life brings. No one is saying that you must deny yourself. But the most satisfying project you will ever undertake—and a mark of a complete human being—is to discover how to build a sense of happiness that no one can take away from you, because you have taken total responsibility for it. The journey to such happiness takes a long time, yet every step is one of fulfillment.